Praise
When your 4-year-old shows you the picture she drew and you have no idea what it is, you say, 'wow! That looks wonderful1" It's an obvious lie to us because all we see is scribbles, but we want her to feel good about her drawing, so we praise. This is called an evaluative praise. Although this seems like a great thing to do, your child isn't learning anything from it, and they may or may not even believe you. We are better off to use descriptive praises. So, instead, you could say, 'I love the way you used different colors. It seems like you were trying to draw a happy picture, and the colors helped you do that!
If you give details, your child learns and believes you! When you pick your kids up for practice, rather than saying 'you did great today!' you can say 'I noticed that you worked really hard today. When your coach told you to run 5 laps, you do it without hesitation and you pushed through even though I could tell you were getting tired.' We also have appreciative praises that let our kids know what they did affected others in a positive way.
Here are some examples of each type of praise:
Vidya Sury Gives us a few ideas when praising our children:
- Make eye contact
- Smile or hug
- Be specific about what you are praising her for
- Do not criticize
- If suitable, reward her
Kids want our attention! You can show them love and care as you give them one on one undivided attention. The way we praise our children matters and it will have an affect on them.
Sury, V. (2021, August 12). Praising children: Can too much praise spoil your child? Vidya Sury, Collecting Smiles. Retrieved March 31, 2023, from https://vidyasury.com/2016/03/praising-children.html
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